So THIS Is What It Feels Like!

I'd forgotten how much fun it can be to get immersed in a project that you enjoy doing. It's been that long. I mean, I enjoyed my book project, but only in retrospect; the actual doing-it part was sheer hell. Right now, however, I'm working on a really interesting new cancer Web site, to which I will link once it's really and truly live, and not only is the work engaging, but it's not all on my shoulders. The pressure isn't on me and me alone, like it was with my book. So while I'm staying up until all hours to get things done, I don't feel the weight of not getting it done the way I did before. I'm mostly doing it because, like I said, this stuff is interesting to edit. I think this site will have something new to add to the Web, and that it will make a difference, however slight, for people with cancer. So I'm motivated.

My other new job--managing editor of an alternative medicine magazine/journal for professionals--is probably going to be a little less engaging over the long term, simply because I am going to be the one responsible for deadlines and meeting them, for answering to others when things don't go as planned. But, right now, as I prepare to take it on, it's exhilarating. I have never been the top editor on a magazine before. I've done everything I'm going to have to do with this journal, but I've always had people over me on the masthead. In this case, while there are people over me in the organization, I am the name and the face of this journal. And as daunting as that feels in some ways, in others it's totally energizing. I'm looking forward to seeing what I can do with this journal, and with how I rise to the occasion. Or not. But all other things being equal, I'm hoping to rise.

Now if only I didn't have to spend 28 hours a week or so at a job to which none of the above superlatives can currently be applied, I'd actually be ENJOYING my professional life. Maybe some day...