Desperately Seeking Stability

After several emails back and forth, my doctor declared my increasing nausea, dizziness and exhaustion--not to mention the soul-crushing irritability and depression--unreasonable and pulled me off of the Wellbutrin. (Crankmama, I'm now officially with you in the "I hate Wellbutrin" club.) In its place, she's put Lexapro; we already know I did OK on Celexa for quite a while, so I should be fine on its close cousin, which supposedly has even fewer side effects. And while I was at the top dose of Celexa, more or less, there's room for me to play with the Lexapro until I get stabilized. (Or not.) The only concern is whether this more potent drug will activate me--that's psych-speak for making someone either anxious or manic--the way Zoloft did. But I'm willing to give it a try, especially if it means I won't spend the next few weeks wanting to crawl into a cave and die the way I have the past few weeks.

It may be a placebo effect, but after not even 48 hours off the Wellbutrin, I'm feeling significantly less queasy. And after not even 24 hours on the Lexapro, I'm feeling a lot calmer, less likely to snap. These are Very Good Things. Whether they continue is anyone's guess.

We'll see.

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Completely unrelated:

As we were walking toward school this morning, a girl got out of a car in the drop-off lane. She was wearing a mini-mini-mini skirt in a check pattern with a matching short jacket, tights, and high heeled, shiny patent-leather knee-high boots. Her lunchbox had her name on it and the words "First Grade."

Thinking that I'd never let my kid out of the house dressed like that--much less buy her the clothes in the first place--I glanced at Em, whose jaw had dropped, and laughed.

"Some outfit, huh?" I said to her as I bent to kiss her goodbye.

"That's totally inappropriate...and especially for a first grader!" my fourth-grade woman-of-the-world replied. "I can't believe her mother let her go out like that!"

The apple doesn't fall far...